My finest arse-texting to date:

“Hi, Can I get the most popular programs but I have a good address and I will not receive the item is faulty goods and baggage is greater the same as a result I have a good address and I will not receive the latest news and sport headlines you want to see. The smaller cabinet in the second bedroom. The only thing that you can get the mattress into the loft without damaging it then that’s fine. I have no memory of this party, and the other day and night out in the morning of the best of luck with the latest in the UK in their lives in London on Saturday morning for you. It was good and I have to leave the office of my own business days to be able for you. A good to be the first to review the movie was the last time we will have a good idea for your help and support to help me out with the following link from a range of products and services to the pool. The first one to one of the nicest beer gardens in the Edinburgh area, but serves food that is excessively expensive and I am a beautiful person who is a bit of a dusting. Probably”